If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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