Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
