i think my mom watched the whole time
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
