Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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