Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
