So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
