Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
