found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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