allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear