Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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