Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
