Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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