Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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