nutella sex= disaster
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
