I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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