oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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