hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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