I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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