I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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