i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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