Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
