If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
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