So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
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He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
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I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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