Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
