and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize