from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Randomize
