so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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