I think I died a long time ago.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Bring me that man meat
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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