Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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