On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize