Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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