are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
they need to just BURY HIM!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Randomize
