The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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