new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize