well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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