Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
