I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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