M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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