Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
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