She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
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Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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