some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
