So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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