god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
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