i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
The beer is more important than you right now.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
