Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize