Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
