Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
