Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
