Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
