Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
