that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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